Bedtime story # 9

Once upon a time there was a very brave Knight. He was blessed with all the good qualities a knight might need: He was courageous, fierce, with a very kind and intrepid heart. He was always gentle with the peasants of the kingdom. He would always take the time to listen to the ones in pain and in need. He would always help them and his kindness – much more than his beauty (after all he was also good-looking) attracted the attention of one of the most kind and beautiful ladies in the kingdom. They were a match made in heaven and they fell deeply in love with each other. They got married and had a very kind child. Everything was going so well in this brave knight’s life that he became invulnerable. No one seemed to be able to beat him. People started talking about his conquers and victories and the word was spread. Fate didn’t like it. She didn’t like the idea of having someone that people might think as invulnerable. She had to keep her power:  when people are fearless they are capable of defying even Fate. She sent the best warriors and beasts she could think of. The knight beat all of them. Fate got furious and saw very clearly that the only way to beat him was to take the most dearly thing he had, in order to break his heart.  She took his family away. She won: he was so broken that he was sure he was also going to die. Actually, he wanted to die. Nothing else in the world mattered to him. He would cry in desperation. He would not eat, drink nor sleep for several days.  He wouldn’t accept help and he drove all his friends away. People would feel very sorry for him but they could do nothing. One kind Fairy heard about the knight’s suffering and cast a spell on him. He would fall in a very deep sleep and would not wake up until he could cope with his Fate. So he fell asleep. At the beginning he would only feel numb, he would not dream. Then, he started dreaming about his loved ones, but the dreams always would end up in nightmares, where he would lose them again, again and again. It was a very tough time and he almost didn’t make it. One night, however, his dream didn’t end up in a nightmare. He was dreaming about his family again, but this time instead of seeing his wife and kid being taken away by some terrible accident he saw them standing up after spending some time with him, kissing him on his forehead and going away holding hands; waving him good-bye and saying “see you soon!”. He would have this same dream for endless nights. One night he asked his wife and kid to stay, to not go away. His wife whispered in his ears: “Don’t worry darling, distance doesn’t matter. What matters is that we will always be in your heart, mind and soul. These memories which are so vivid and heartbreaking for you now, will help you to come alive one day. After that night, he had many dreamless ones. During these, he would hear a laugh coming from somewhere around him. The sound of this laugh was so fresh that one day he dared to open his eyes, and he saw, through the window, a group of ladies sitting on the bench outside his bedroom. One of them caught his attention: she seemed so peaceful and kind; her smile could light up a dark room and the sound of her laugh was like music to his ears. He closed his eyes again and dreamed about the pretty lady. In the middle of the dream, he woke up for the first time since the spell was cast on him. He felt alive but torn apart by guilt. How could he have dared to dream about someone else other than his beloved wife? This regret put him to sleep again. He keeps dreaming. One night he dreams about his family hoping that he gets them to stay with him; the other he dreams about the pretty lady hoping he wouldn’t feel so guilty after it. What he doesn’t know is that he is not ready yet. He will be one day, but first he has to get himself together. He has to be able to find all the pieces of his broken heart, glue them with the good memories of his beloved ones and learn to walk again. Baby steps before being able to running into the fields again, ridding his horse, felling the sun and the wind; felling alive; being able to fall in love again.

Goodbye My Lover

James Blunt

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
‘Cause I saw the end before we’d begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what’s mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
and may be over but it won’t stop there,
I am here for you if you’d only care.
touched my heart you touched my soul.
you changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I’ve kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I’ve been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me. (bis)

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can’t break my spirit – it’s my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I’ve seen you cry, I’ve seen you smile.
I’ve watched you sleeping for a while.
I’d be the father of your child.
I’d spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We’ve had our doubts but now we’re fine,
And I love you, I swear that’s true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I’m asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I’m kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I’m so hollow, baby, I’m so hollow.
I’m so, I’m so, I’m so hollow


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